Fire Away

Do not attempt this at home.  Portions of this program not affecting outcome may have been edited.  Please keep your hands inside the vehicle at all times.  Objects in this mirror may be larger than they appear.  Void where prohibited.  Prices in Alaska and Hawaii may be higher.  Do not fold, spindle, or mutilate.  Drink responsibly.  Don't tread on me.  Save the whales. Do not remove under penalty of law.

Part of a complete breakfast.  Batteries not included.  You put it together.  Ask for the Wolfman. Accessories sold separately.  Wash in cold, tumble dry.  Use in a well-ventilated space.  Use with a water-based lubricant.  May cause diarrhea. Safe on children and pets.  Never tested on animals.  Hormone- and antibiotic-free. Mind the gap.  Fall into The Gap. Just a sprinkle a day helps keep odor away.  Des pâtes, des pâtes - oui, mais Des Panzani! 

Be kind, rewind!  Severe tire damage. Burn after reading. Take one!  Correct change only.  Slower traffic keep right. No Personal Checks.  Visiting hours are over. Stop and smell the roses. Breakfast All Day.  It's nothing personal.  Three chairs, no waiting. Service animals only. Only you can prevent forest fires. This is your brain on drugs - any questions?  I learned it from you, Dad; I learned it from watching you!

Limit 5 per customer.  Some assembly required. Past performance is not a guarantee of future growth.  Supplies are limited. Your mileage may vary.  Reach out and touch someone. Soup or salad?   Do you have any Grey Poupon?  They're Grrrrreat!  May I have the language of origin.  Please enter your four digit PIN. Perhaps you should consult your Rho Chi.  Ain't that some shhhh? The color-coded maps and signs match the stations.  Please hold on.  And I helped!  Wilkommen, Bienvenue, Welcome!  A hospital, what is it? Well?  We're waiting... Not including the mezzanine. 

Say what?  Do your damn job. Ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny.  This is my land, this is mine - it is beautiful and it is mine.  Don't believe me, just watch?  Mother may I?  Wakey, wakey!  Howdy!  Reuniti on ice, Reuniti so nice. You've got to, got to reap what you sow. Birthday party cheesecake, jellybean boom! Most extraordinary. Fair enough. Queen of Romania.  Kill the headlights and put it in neutral. Paint the Mother green.  Oh come, oh come, oh, come drink beer with meeeee. OK, kids - time for bed!  Copy that.  Donger needs food!  Hidey ho! 

I'd like to buy a vowel.  Is that your final answer?  Will you still love me tomorrow.  You know, my love, I will.  I'd like to teach the world to sing.  Adam's housecat.  Tout le monde se leve pour Dannon.  Choosy moms choose Jif!   Don't be fooled by cheap imitations.  If you love Giorgio, you'll love these Impostors. Come back to Jamaica.  We want chicken, we want liver.  Do not touch!  Genuine Naugahyde.  He probably smells my dog.  We heard that you were feeling ill.  Please secure your own mask before assisting others.  Not-so-tiny Tim. That's a paddlin'.  Holy cows!  Catburgers in Meowadise.  Wanna saaaaalad?  Shut up, kid.  Chantilly lace, and a pretty face, and a ponytail, hanging down.

Marvelous. Sweet and clear as can be. Hello to you, too.  Believe it or not.  Might as well face it. The night is bitter, the stars have lost their glitter.  Qu'est-ce-qui est près de l'hôtel?  All good.  Call me Ishmael.  Rowdydow.  Let me see your alligator - what's that, you say?


Christopher said…
Now that's a spicy meatball.