Confidential to Bessie: Yeah I misunderstood you, but I think it's reasonable to see how it happened. Also, I said what I said, and I am not wrong.
Confidential to the salad dealer: You were not wrong, but there was not enough time to get the whole story out there, plus, you were closing in an hour. But thank you for checking in.
Confidential to the woman in front of me today. You got my polite honk. What you deserved was me laying on my horn. Maybe it was your first day on Earth, but I prefer to think you were just clueless.
Confidential to the woman next to me in the parking lot. Solidarity sister. I know the crazed look. I get it. I really do.
Confidential to the two rabbits who visit our yard: I miss you. Come back soon.
Confidential to the ninja mailman: Snitches get stitches, but thanks for the salient lesson.
Confidential to Jerry/Larry/Gary: Thanks for always being nice, even if you seem a little weird.
Confidential to Big Boy: Thanks for always being nice, even if I seem a little weird.
Confidential to the Northern Union Man: Enjoy looking out at the water. Enjoy your once a year day.
Confidential to Livraison - Thanks for the chevre.
Confidential to Bra Designers Everywhere: Bring back the torpedo bra. They are hilarious.
Confidential to Wal-Mart: Your clothes are slowly getting better. Please keep it up because Loft totally fucked my life up.
Confidential to Loft: I'm still fucking bitter. You suck.
Confidential to Douglas at BHAH: You and Drs. G and W are the soul of the place. Don't ever leave.
Confidential to the BHAH Tabby: My dog may try to eat you, but I think you are a delight.
Confidential to the rando woman at BHAH today: The fact that you are a lawyer has no bearing on any of the rest of your story, and if anything, I like you less. Cute kitty, though.
Confidential to X: Can you see where when you show me something that is the exact opposite of what I just asked for, I am going to shut down?
Confidential to Y: Can you see where asking me to dumb down my materials to make it easier for you to pass them off as yours is total bullshit?
Confidential to the guy at the pharmacy: If I had a horn, I would laid on it like I would have with the woman in front of me. What the actual hell?
Confidential to me: You might need a little self-care. See what you can do.