This morning, I stumbled upon this in my Facebook Memories:
What I didn't know at the time is that I was awfully close to leaving that job and starting my current one.
This is why I have a little mind trick I play with myself. Whenever I'm feeling hopeless or frustrated or despairing, I think to myself, well, if I look back on this six months from now, will I just laugh at how worked up I was and be grateful for some intervention or change that rendered this agitation completely futile? The answer is almost always, "probably".
Time lends perspective.
Therapy also helps. I was definitely getting therapy at the time. I still am. After telling my therapist at our first appointment that I didn't want this to be a long-term thing. Whoops! As long as it helps, I'm sticking with it. And it helps.
In other news, I am going to see Mom this weekend, and although she doesn't know it yet - we're going to get her hearing tested. I will get her a nice lunch afterwards. I'm not a monster. Her hearing isn't where it should be, and honestly, I think she would be happier if she'd get back to wearing hearing aids. She claims she doesn't need them. Everyone around her loudly says otherwise.
We don't have huge plans other than that - dinner with the blended fam. Maybe some shopping? I don't know. It's hard to know what's needed, sometimes until you get there. I know we're making up for Christmas, sort of. Minus much of the hoopla. Basically, I am giving Mom the stuff I bought her. Thankfully, none of that was a new puppy.
Anyway, in six months, I'll look back on all that as something that is a vague, fuzzy memory. But today, I'm a little stressed, a little overwhelmed.
A string walked into a bar - the bartender said, "Sorry, pal - we don't serve strings here".
So the string leaves, goes into the alley, twists himself up, rolls around on the ground, stands next to an HVAC vent for a few minutes, goes back inside.
The bartender says, "Say, aren't you that string that was just in here?"
"No", the string replies, "I'm a frayed knot."