Silence is Stainless Steel

I've had some crazy dreams recently, including a lot of snakes, but the bigger recurring theme is that I'm being called on to deliver some standup comedy, and I don't have anything prepared, and I blow it.

I feel like that's a sign that I need to be prepared to deliver a few minutes at some impromptu time in the future.  Or that I really want to be doing standup, and I need to stop waiting to be asked at the last minute to fill in, because that's not how it works.

I had a dream about an old HS guidance counselor, as well as snakes - and there's more than a passing connection between the two.    

It's been over 25 years since I did standup, and I did it once.  Once.  I've more recently done improv, but that's been more like an 18 year break.   Maybe I need to perform.  Or maybe I'm just feeling generally unprepared and not especially creative.

Worth considering.

Last night, I had a dream that an old friend of mine was getting off a bus in front of me and busted his head open.  I couldn't dial 911 on my phone - I kept hitting the wrong buttons - so I eventually drove him to the hospital.  I think I like the snakes better.

The other thing that's been going on a lot recently is that my nose is in overdrive.  I am extraordinarily affected by smells.  That, in and of itself is nothing new.  The smells that bother me most are artificial fragrances used in candles, cleaning supplies and personal care products.  Bath and Body Works, Yankee Candle, Lysol...

There is a woman that works at the Sonic near my house who wears a floral personal fragrance of some kind that is so strong, and/or worn in such excess, that I can smell it long after she has handed me my food and I've driven off.  It's just heavy - and not pleasant.  I honestly avoid that Sonic whenever possible for that reason.  It is especially egregious paired with the cooking oil used to fry their tater tots - and, to be completely honest, their oil is often a  Not rancid, just, time to change it.

Once, I had a Mexican meal in Atlanta where something in the meal had a cleaning fluid placed too near it - or some fluid had gotten into the meal- I don't know - but the chemical smell (Fabulosa, I think) permeated my brain for hours.  I might have ingested some, to be honest.  It was not a good night.

The current thing I smell all the time now is marijuana.  And I'm talking skunky.  I smell it as it is being smoked, or on people's clothing.  And I don't know if this is my newest super power, but it's so odd.  What's especially odd is that I can even smell it with my mask on.  So, maybe the locals have gotten hold of an especially strong strain of ditch weed.  I don't know.  It's loud though.

And it's not that I care, I'm just surprised.  Sure, it's decriminalized here for personal use, but it's not legal - and those two things are different enough to make the distinction.  

When we first moved into this house, there was a Colonial bakery just down the road, and on Thursdays, they baked cinnamon bread.  And we could smell it - it would drive you WILD.  So good. They tore down the bakery to build...something.  Condos?  I don't know - they also tore down a huge magnolia tree that was on the property - people were more incensed about the tree than the lack of cinnamon bread.  To each his own.

One of the reasons I go to the hair salon that I use is because they're an Aveda salon, and I like the way their products smell - very herbaceous, and nothing that is fake vanilla, or super musky, or overly flowery.  

As for flowers themselves, the smell of stargazer lilies make me want to punch someone.  They are so strong, and they make my throat hurt.  I may very well be allergic to them.  Whereas I love the smell of marigolds, and they're not known for their pleasant fragrance.  

I once said that if they made a rosemary water fragrance, I would buy it.  I've worn lavender water off and on over the years, and I have no objection to patchouli from time to time.  I like some colognes for men better than others, but for the most part, I like things that are citrusy and green.  

Mostly, it's that kind of thing.

I'm picky, apparently.

On the topic of fragrance - my nephew turned 13 on Saturday - and given that I was a 13 year old girl 33 years ago, I was a little confounded on what to get him.  I ended up getting him a "Vintage 2008" t-shirt, which is cute to me, but probably hideously dorky to him.  I also got a men's skincare kit by Nivea.  Body wash, face wash, moisturizer, aftershave.  My feeling was, it is higher quality than Axe, and smells better - but isn't too girly.  It came in a very cool linen/canvas bag, and I hear he'll be using it for travel this summer.  So, mission accomplished, as much as one can without succumbing to buying a gift card.  

As this weekend was also Mother's Day, let it be said that I took care of Mom when I was down for her doctor's appointment last month.  I bought her a skirt and a shirt from Talbots, thus extending her wardrobe nicely.

Piper does not gift me on Mother's Day, and that is fine.  We're honestly more either peers, or in a conservatorship.  I think Piper thinks of me as her personal valet.  Maybe that's the most accurate.  I'm her "beck and call girl" - as they say.

I did, however, buy myself a little something for being good this year - it's a vaccination t-shirt that reads:

Moderna &
Pfizer &
Johnson &

You know, just a little something to make things seem a little less crazy.

It looks as though I will head back into the office on the 6th of July - and that's kind of exciting.  There won't be many of us.  I feel bad about that, but it's how it goes.  I'll still get to see people from time to time, and that's always good.

Meanwhile, the summer is sort of fleshing out nicely.  I need to put in for the bits and pieces of time off that I want to take off - I don't think we have a full trip to anywhere planned - nor will we til fall, probably - but, we do have a trip to Atlanta to see my sister and nephew while they visit Mom, and we'll go see Matt's family on that visit as well.  Not to mention, some time in the mountains - mostly a "working" trip - and that's OK.  There will be partying, too.

I have put out feelers to see if anyone would like to go to a Lookouts game in Chattanooga this summer - mostly because there is a team they play called the Rocket City Trash Pandas.  And that's amazing.

This, for those wondering, is a trash panda:

Courtesy of National Geographic

Much like the electric eel is a danger noodle, and a snake is a nope rope.

So, with that, and keeping the house in check, and work - well, it's not just a job, it's an adventure.

Wish me luck.  Wish me a lot of things.




Christopher said…
Good luck. And I wonder if the unusual scents are contributing to your unusual dreams. The olfactory sense really does have a profound effect on the brain so that actually seems likely. In fact it just occurred to me that instead of, or maybe in addition to, white noise machines someone should invent a nighttime smell dispenser, although what smells would guarantee pleasant dreams would be hard to pin down.
And here's hoping you get to go to a Lookouts game. I still miss seeing the Sounds play at Greer Stadium. Yeah, it was old and shabby, but that was part of the charm.