I think there's something you should know...

People often advise to "trust your instincts".  My instincts are often wrong.  For example, I was going to put some ice and water in my giant drinkin' mug this morning, and standing in an open space just past my cube was a group of contractors who are doing reno work on our floor.  I was passing them just as one said, "Yeah, I had a big pile of studs...", and I had to stifle my instinct to joke that they themselves were a big pile of studs.  Mostly because, while I'm sure they're lovely guys, they are not, in a conventional sense, studly.  But also because when I objectify men,  I become part of the problem.  #ThemToo.

I managed to not say anything.  Which is good.

When it was time to get my second mug, and thankfully, the stud-pile has disbanded and moved elsewhere in the building. 

The keto continues to go well, but like anything that works, you have to prepare and plan.  That said, last night I made salmon, and it was so freaking good.  And I am completely indifferent to salmon, for the most part.

So, I have a wedding to attend in late March, and I am struggling with what to wear.  The one dress I have that is moderately appropriate in formality is I think wrong for the season.  I don't want to spend a ton of money, but I also want to look as good as I feel - and the thing is, I feel pretty great!  But I also don't want to show my arms, because as great as I feel, they're going to need a little more time to catch up.

But just because I want my arms covered, doesn't mean I need my neckline high and tight. I need to show that skin!

And if I can find the dress that does those two things, the color is extremely blah.  I don't do blah.  Or if it's a print, it's frumpy.  Or if it's an OK color or print, it has weird rivets in an obvious place, or laces up at the hem, or has heavy seam that bisects the dress down the front and screams, "Hey - follow this line with your eyes.  Start at the turkey neck, end at the lace up corset hem with extra rivets.

What I'm saying is, clothes are hard and frustrating, and I'm kind of over it.  All of it. 

In the right woman, this would be adorable.  On me it would look like a tennis ball shoved into a novelty condom.

The fact that we're nudging toward the final day of January doesn't help.  It's cold as a mother out there.  Here in Tennessee, we hit our high for the day - mid 20s.  The kind of weather where you don't care how badly your hair needs washing, you would rather look like an oil slick than spend even a minute with wet hair once you hop out of the shower.  Or, maybe that's just me.  But folks, it's cold.  My skin hurts, and there isn't enough lotion on the planet to make me look less like Dandruff Woman - the new Head and Shoulders spokeshero.    But great news - it'll be in the 60s on Sunday.  No wonder my sinuses are completely confused.

Anyway, it's hard to think of what early spring feels like when your skin looks and feels like that of a molting iguana.  Do iguanas molt?  I don't know, probably though.  Let's just assume they do.

And yes, I'm drinking my water!  That's a big part of the whole keto thing.  Don't want to get that keto flu.   Sadly, the only way I can chug massive amounts of water is if it's cold, and that's super pleasant in this weather.

Wow, I'm complain-y today.

But truthfully, physical discomfort aside, I'm happy, happy.  I really am!

I just wouldn't mind some exfoliation and few days on the beach.

Great, thanks!



"Clothes are hard and frustrating."

Also, you need to show skin.

The solution is really obvious, isn't it?