Fine Print

So, I was just clearing some paperwork off my desk.  Like you do after a day of meetings where your eyes hurt, and you're vaguely nauseated from a steady stream of junk food ingested at said meetings to keep you from dozing off in the warm, dark conference room.

I came across my discharge instructions from the Vertigo Vomit Fest of 2017, and I thought, "You know, that might be a useful training material for next month - loading documentation for trigger events." So, I thought - "I could obscure the PHI, and we could practice attaching those files to progress notes."

Yep, my doc's name was Hang Lu. 

Then, I started actually reading the notes, and on about page eight, there's a column that talks about Chronic Kidney Disease and how the testing in question may be inaccurate on pregnant women, people with serious co-morbidities and people of extreme size.  At first, I didn't read the column accurately, and I thought it was describing me as a woman with serious co-morbidities and of extreme size.  So I quietly put away my discharge papers and decided I wasn't going to share.  Not with my class, not even my doctor (who I really *should* offer them to).

I'm sensitive about my size - especially recently, as I've been eating out of control and putting on pounds without batting an eye.

I'm still down considerably from a year ago, and I am good with that - but if I don't get back on track, like, yesterday - I'm in for a serious lifetime of pain, agony and defeat. 

So, I need to find a new app - time to write every bite.  I need to walk away from the sugar, I need to drink tons of water.  I need to take better care of myself than I have been.  Because although I had just misread the paper, I do have some health concerns.  My size isn't extreme.  It's extremely personal, though, and I need to work harder and smarter to be healthy.  I know I feel better when I eat right.  It's time to put my money where my mouth is.  And by money, I mean spinach.  Kale.  Sweet potatoes.  Chicken.

Get to getting!

That's it, peeps.  That's it, and that's all.

Except... there's so much good food out there.  This is, culinarily, the most wonderful time of the year. 

And the new rule is - I'll eat it if it's amazing. Like, M&Ms aren't worth it - but a few squares of Nestle Damak bar might be.
I don't need to go nuts for donuts.  Now, almond tart?  Obviously.  Sparkling water gets me just as bubbly as champagne and it doesn't make me feel like hammered dog shit.

Eat a burger, but hold out for Gabby's.  Don't eat at a joint that is repped by a franchised clown.

I can say all of this because it's easy to make diet promises on a full belly.

But Little Debbie isn't my friend.  And Hostess Snacks are not hospitable.

I just need to remember this.  As usual.

Be good, be good at it, and I'll catch you tomorrow - we'll see how it goes.