All The Way Home

I actually really enjoy puzzles.  Crosswords, Sudoku, jigsaw, escape rooms – I like taking small pieces of information, connecting them to other information, and determining the outcome.
So, I had a sort of real life application of it this week, and I’m pretty stoked.  In a mildly “ewwww” kind of way. You’ve been warned.
Last weekend, I felt sort of vague and gross and cranky and under the weather.  I knew it was partially the junk food I had been shoveling down my throat all week.  But I slept a lot and tried to recharge.  
This week, I slept better at night, sort of.  I started waking up at least twice a night to pee.  Which, you know – is a lot.  And when twice turned into three times, I blamed constipation, because of a vague stomachache.  And then, I started wondering, well hell, do I have diabetes?  I let that sit in the back of my mind for a while, but it didn’t make sense.  I just had my biometric screening for work and my blood sugar was fine.  It has never been elevated – a fact which I’m sure irritates my primary care physician because it’s not ammo she can use.  But I doubted I had just suddenly become diabetic overnight.   
I finally got the missing puzzle piece yesterday afternoon. 
Cloudy urine with some mild burning.
AHA!!!!!  UTI (urinary tract infection).  Suddenly, everything made sense and fell into place.  The symptoms all made sense and fit together.  The ache, the crankiness, the fatigue, the excessive peeing…
So, at that point, I was leaving work for the day, and I wanted to get home.  I didn’t want to go to an Urgent Care center.  Or my doctor’s office – they have walk-in care from 5-8PM.  But I was whipped, and I needed to let the dog out, and I knew I had Project Runway with my friend Rosie at 7:45.  So I decided I’d find a clinic that opened at 7AM to TCB this morning.
And that’s when I learned about something so fabulous, I’m sharing it here.

One of our local hospitals, St. Thomas, has a Virtual Urgent Care on Demand option.  Basically medical attention for minor stuff over the phone/Skype, etc.   Pink eye,  Rashes, Strep, Fevers…and UTIs. 
Basically, you have to be a state of TN resident and willing to pay $50.   It’s not covered by insurance. But they do a quick pre-screen – and if they determine you need to be seen in person, you pay nothing.  If they can help you, they will.    Well, that seemed completely fair to me, so I typed in some info into their registration screen, and 13 minutes later, I got a call from a Nurse Practitioner in Seattle.  He asked me some questions, I told him my symptoms and then he had me tap on my kidneys and abdomen.  He agreed with my diagnosis, and called in a prescription for Macrobid (doesn’t that sound like a massive online auction site?), recommended some AZO, warned me that the latter would turn my pee orange, and we were on our way.
Here’s the thing.  I am a decent diagnostician.   My mother is a nurse, my father did medical support on ambulances.  So, I can speak the lingo.  I can also research my ailment and speak to it effectively.   The other thing is, I’m looking for antibiotics.  Pills that, by their nature, make you feel terrible to make you feel better.  So, I wasn’t drug seeking for recreation.
And here’s the thing.  If I don’t feel better, then I can go see my PCP.   
But so far, I feel better.  I mean, I feel UTI better.  I feel antibiotic yucky, but that happens.  Also, that AZO, totally turns your wizz orange.    Which is freaky, but whatever – it seems to be working.   I’m just glad he told me that, or else I’d be having a freakout at the office.
Almost exactly.
So, I’m guessing this type of service exists in a lot of cities. 
Also, if you haven't seen The Campaign - the movie quoted and shown above, you really, really need to give it a look-see.  It is so funny. 


Christopher said…
You weren't seeking recreational drugs but can your PCP hook you up with some PCP?
Probably not, but it's something to think about now that I've got Spinal Tap's "All The Way Home" stuck in my head.