Well, that was...

Here's how I woke up this morning.  From a dream in which I was dealing with a very old, very ill Lola.  I was trying to justify to my mother how I didn't want to euthanize her, and said, "What would you do if it were one of the pugs?"  And she said, "Well the pugs wouldn't act like this."

In an offshoot of this same dream, I was on an airplane with most of my family and lots of friends, but could not find my seat on the plane.  And I kept spilling things on myself.  And my family might have been zombies.  I never did clear that up.

I woke up more tired than when I went to bad.

Now, OK - 2013 hasn't been all bad.

I got to take some fun trips for work - the CAT Conference in NYC, the Alaska trip earlier this month, Chicago in the fall - there were some happy, fun times.

I got to spend time with the families and that's always a good thing, no matter the circumstance.

But I'm not here to be positive, today, dammit.  I want to wallow in my own self pity.

In January, I totaled my car making a left onto South Douglas, jamming my knee into the console - I have a scar.  One of the women in the other car walked onto an ambulance to have her neck looked at.  Great!  Awesome.  I was cited for making an unprotected left.  Failure to yield, I guess.

And then, two days later, I took Lola on one last walk, and had her put down.  It was the kindest thing I could do, but, clearly it still bothers me.  See above.

I hope I am telling her here, how much I love her.

A few days after that, I left for Ohio, where I got a speeding ticket.  Are we having fun yet?

I spent a lot of February laid out with a mystery illness - fever, chills.  And given that February is a short month, it didn't take much for it to blow.

March wasn't too bad.  I got to see a flock of Cedar Waxwings land in my parents' back yard with Dad.  I went to Canada.  I learned to twirl tassels.

April.  Well, Dad got sick.  I didn't blog about it much, but he was just sort of bedridden and nonspecfically sick.  I went to Atlanta for a workday in the mountains, and thought that might be the last time I ever saw Dad.  

May.  I spent the better part of a day cleaning out Mom and Dad's koi pond and a week later, a raccoon stripped the pond of its three residents.  Dad went into the hospital for a few days, I cut my leg on a tree branch up in the mountains while riding the Rhino.   I attempted a Couch to 5K regimen, but this is when I really started putting weight back on.

June.  Dad made a comment to Mom about my weight, which I unintentionally overheard.
I went to Las Vegas for the first time.  Stayed in a hotel that was extremely nasty.  I caught a cold.  I got jock itch, or whatever you want to call it.   I did get to go to Zappos, where one of their Culture Lords told me that "frustration is gold".  I believed it at the time, but I now wonder if frustration isn't actually fool's gold.

July.  Well, the annual picnic in the mountains was cancelled due to rain, but we met up at Alan and Judi's cabin with some of the other hardcore people.  That was fun.  Otherwise, July was a blur - travel, work... the usual. Scratched my cornea.

August.  More travel.  Back to Las Vegas.  My 20th reunion, which stressed my fat self out.  I survived it, and went to Waffle House when it was over.  Got hooked on Breaking Bad.

September.  Travel.  Second place in the State Fair.  Travel, mostly.

October.  Well, on the morning of October 10th, I posted this to Facebook:

Little did I know it was my mother, trying to call me on Dad's cellphone to let me know he'd had a stroke and was at North Fulton.  So, that was October.  Pretty much all of October.  I had a birthday, I went to a Halloween party,  my department didn't win the costume contest.  But mostly it was aphasia and rehab and therapy and fear.  And anger.  Ohh, the anger.

November was fear, anger and travel.  So much travel.  And anger.  And Thanksgiving. 

December was less travel, about the same amount of fear, and a little more anger.  Mom got pneumonia (or maybe bronchitis, but they decided to treat it like pneumonia) And Christmas.  And then the day after Christmas, I got sick.  I'm still a little sick.

And so, today, the last day of this fucking disaster of a year, I say good riddance.

I will gladly put this year behind me.  Here's to a happier, healthier, more joy-filled 2014.



If wishing it for you can make it so, then you're going to have an awesome 2014. Hugs.