Au Revoir, Salome

If I had to grab a takeaway from today, it would be the reminder that, while the squeaky wheel gets the oil, it does so at the cost of being known as a squeaker.  I'll get to that in a second.

First, let me tell you about Salome.

Stolen from Facebook.*

Here's what I know about her.  She and her husband, and their dogs live in Florida.  She has dogs, which automatically scores points.

She is the CFO of my company, and for the first several years of my employment, she was the only woman in a high level leadership role - which scored a lot of points as well - especially given that she had some real sexist a-holes as counterparts.  I'm still friends with some of those a-holes, but let's call it like we see it.  They would probably admit it.

Salome is always impeccably dressed and coiffed.  She, I believe, is the person who stocked the women's bathroom with nice hairspray.  After using it copiously several times, my guilt got the better of me, and I put in a contribution of some crappy White Rain or Aqua Net - it's been there for over a year, and still has a few good sprays left.  I now use it instead of the good stuff, which would be wasted on my hair.  Let's face it - Elmer's Glue might be my best option.

Although I don't know her well, I've always found her to be a reasonable woman with a sense of humor.  No drama.  Just has her shit together, and keeps it that way.

Now, we recently learned that Salome was calling it quits, and frankly, I don't blame her.  The every other week trips to Nashville probably got old.  Her husband and dogs need her.  I get it.  I'm jealous to report that she's taking a sabbatical and not immediately entering back into the fray.  I hope she enjoys Florida and gets some much needed "Salome Time".

A few months back, we learned that we were moving offices again, and at that time, we also learned that they were planning to take the curvicles with us.

You might have read about that day, here.

Anyway, cut to today. Our quarterly All-Hands meeting.  Salome was giving her last report on the new space (anticipated move in, November/December) and she called me up to the front of the meeting.  She told everyone that she was leaving because I'd been so angry about the curvicles, that she was afraid of me**. And that she was pleased to announce we would be ditching them and getting quad-cubicles instead.

There was much rejoicing, and not just from me.

She then went on to say that I should mention her favorably in my blog.  I looked at her, stunned.

"How did you know I have a blog?", I asked.

She replied, "I have my sources."

It occurs to me that as CFO, she has access to my full name, SSN, permanent record, and probably even knows the last time I pulled up porn at the office - I meant to go to the Dick's Sporting Goods site, I swear.

So, Salome, if you're reading this, well done, Madame.  We thank you for the cubes.  We thank you for the last seven years of service at PureSafety.

Go, run... get out and enjoy your new-found freedom.

And for anyone who is reading this because they heard Salome mention it at our AHOD... welcome.  If you want a sample of what I'm really capable of...

Read the funniest thing I've written in a long time.

*Salome, out of respect of your privacy, I will happily replace this photo with one of your dogs if you'll send it.

**It should be noted - I'm a lover, not a fighter.


Awesomeness on so many levels here. :)