My loved ones have begun asking what I'd like for Christmas - I need to put together a little list, and I was daydreaming about it as I was driving in.
As it turns out, I'm kind of vapid this year.
I was catching a quick glance in the rearview mirror and thought, "Hmm, maybe a little botox for Christmas."
And then I thought, "...And maybe whiten the teeth a little, get the eyebrows good and waxed. A Boot Camp session or two..."
So, you know - that's me. Maybe I should ask for some tanning while I'm at it - colored contact lenses. A dye job. A Brazilian Butt Lift?
Here's the wish list, for reals:
- Socks. I always need them. Black, knee high. Identical. I want 5 days worth of worry-free sock options.
- Work-out clothes. Because it's hard to shake my groove thing if I'm feeling frumpy. I desperately need sports bras in particular, because I need to be contained.
- New earbuds. Mine are starting to fray at the connection, and are getting a little crackly. I don't require nice ones, but these are hilarious.
- Magazine subscriptions - Southern Living and Mental Floss. Because I'm nothing if not diverse.
- A SodaStream. Because, making my own fizzy water is kind of appealing. Of course, do I need another kitchen gadget? No.
- Bath stuff. Because getting clean is as much fun as getting dirty. Or so says Mr. Bubble.
- A Thesaurus, because I use the word 'because' too much.
- A book or two. It's not Christmas without a little lazy reading time.
- A pocket knife or small Gerber tool. I lost mine to the TSA a few years ago.
- An umbrella like the ones in Blade Runner:
I'm pretty sure I'm getting one. If so, I'm stoked. Seriously, how freaking cool is that?
Look, I don't NEED anything. A new box of crayons is never a bad thing.
I love chapstick.
I'm easy. I like the giving better than the getting, anyway.
But for real, if you did want to give me a few hits with the botox needle, I'd be delighted.
If you wanted to give me some botulism laced fruitcake to get started on that post-holiday weight loss, I'd be fine with that, too.
ae
As it turns out, I'm kind of vapid this year.
I was catching a quick glance in the rearview mirror and thought, "Hmm, maybe a little botox for Christmas."
And then I thought, "...And maybe whiten the teeth a little, get the eyebrows good and waxed. A Boot Camp session or two..."
So, you know - that's me. Maybe I should ask for some tanning while I'm at it - colored contact lenses. A dye job. A Brazilian Butt Lift?
Here's the wish list, for reals:
- Socks. I always need them. Black, knee high. Identical. I want 5 days worth of worry-free sock options.
- Work-out clothes. Because it's hard to shake my groove thing if I'm feeling frumpy. I desperately need sports bras in particular, because I need to be contained.
- New earbuds. Mine are starting to fray at the connection, and are getting a little crackly. I don't require nice ones, but these are hilarious.
- Magazine subscriptions - Southern Living and Mental Floss. Because I'm nothing if not diverse.
- A SodaStream. Because, making my own fizzy water is kind of appealing. Of course, do I need another kitchen gadget? No.
- Bath stuff. Because getting clean is as much fun as getting dirty. Or so says Mr. Bubble.
- A Thesaurus, because I use the word 'because' too much.
- A book or two. It's not Christmas without a little lazy reading time.
- A pocket knife or small Gerber tool. I lost mine to the TSA a few years ago.
- An umbrella like the ones in Blade Runner:
I'm pretty sure I'm getting one. If so, I'm stoked. Seriously, how freaking cool is that?
Look, I don't NEED anything. A new box of crayons is never a bad thing.
I love chapstick.
I'm easy. I like the giving better than the getting, anyway.
But for real, if you did want to give me a few hits with the botox needle, I'd be delighted.
If you wanted to give me some botulism laced fruitcake to get started on that post-holiday weight loss, I'd be fine with that, too.
ae
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