New and Improved

Well, I'm back in the diet saddle again.  I've made a few minor slips, but nothing like the days of debauchery all last week, and the week before, and so on.

I'm inspired by all the women doing really well at my meeting - and a little jealous.  So, naturally, if I can't beat them, I shall join them.

I am very glad it's the weekend.  The week flew by, as they so often do, but I need a little R and R - because on Monday evening, I fly to Baltimore for a whirlwind customer appeasement tour.  I get to go with three guys I like a good bit - Bill in Sales, Greg in PDev and Jonathan who is our Safety professional.  And then me - token estrogen and trainer extraordinaire.

Meanwhile in the actual office itself, a little drama, a lot of training...  it's all good.  I actually may need to go into the office and get caught up a little tomorrow.  I spent a lot of today in meetings and performing one of the most painful tasks of the year.  Self-evaluation time.

And since we're on the topic of painful tasks, I'm biting the bullet tomorrow and going to Tiba Nu for a service.  A service involving wax.  I decided if I'm going to be taking lots of water classes, and I am, I will want to have the luxury of a low maintenance "hairstyle".  I think you know what I'm saying here.

[STAGE WHISPER] She's getting a bikini wax [/STAGE WHISPER].

I know I have glorified the porn muff, and less than a year ago, in a post lovingly titled "Leave it to Beaver", I swore I'd never wax.  Well, you know - I have a $20 credit from Tiba Nu, and new swimsuit that doesn't have a concealing old-lady skirt on it.

So, opinions can change. And let's be clear, I'm not getting it all waxed off - just neatening it up a little.  I still have no desire to look like a 10 year old.  I just don't want to have to deal with it every time I want to hit up Aqua Zumba or Water Circuit or even just go hang out on a pontoon boat with my peeps.  Note to self... gotta rent a pontoon boat this summer.  Invite peeps.

Aside from the pain factor, and the basic embarrassment of having a total stranger getting all up in my business - I'm stoked.  I'll post pictures once it's done!

Kidding.  I'll be glad to give you the rundown of awfulness on a scale of one to ten, but this won't be going up on Facebook or Twitter or here.  Some things are best left unshown.

Insert vulgar "If you've seen one, you've seen 'em all"  joke here.

And now, for something completely different.

So, last weekend, I marked another first off my list.  I went to a gay bar.

I myself am not gay.  I do, however have a handful of gay friends.  And they were all going out Saturday night and invited me to join them.

My only prior gay bar experience was this.  I unknowingly walked into a bar in Atlanta once called Bulldogs to get change for the parking meter, and found myself surrounded by gay black men.  I quickly got change and got the hell out.  I felt awkward, like an intruder.

Well, that was 10 years ago.  Last Saturday, I walked into Tribe, wearing the exact same jacket from ten years ago, come to think of it, and it was a different scene.  First of all there were a few women there, second of all, I have a ton more confidence, and third, I was invited.

I found my friends, and the only awkward part of the night is that I'm fucking short.  I have some seriously tall friends. And I'm hard of hearing anyway, so given the noise in the bar, the distance that sound had to travel to reach my ears and my issues, I stood there and just grinned and nodded a lot.  

I also stared a lot.  I mean, I have to be honest.  There were some really nice smelling, attractive guys there.  And I mean other than the ones I met up with.  I am fortunate to have a lot of good looking male friends, and I'll be honest, sometimes when I'm out with a group of guys, I think other women are kind of thinking "what's so special about her?"

It doesn't hurt that I'm funny and I offer to be the designated driver.

So not only was my crew looking pretty spiffy, there were scads of nice looking guys as far as the eye could see.

And since I clearly wasn't up for grabs, I could stand there and just stare all I wanted without feeling like a hideous troll.  I stared for awhile at the bartender who had his shirt off, and had a pair of angel wings tattooed on his back.  Apparently, he is pretty popular.  I got caught by my friends checking out this one guy and his date, who was either a really dolled up plus sized girl, or a really dolled up guy in plus size girl drag.  I was checking out his/her dress, and the fact that s/he looked damn hot.  And thinking I need a little black dress to wear out and about like that.

My friend Jim has agreed to go with me to the bar next door, called Play so that we can dance.  He assured me that "all were welcome".  I told him I felt completely comfortable at Tribe, and I did.

It's funny, I think I'm starting to get more comfortable in my own skin.  And that's good - it's the only skin I've got.

And tomorrow, it'll be skin with a little less hair.

Wish me luck.



Unknown said…
That's where we should go to get our dance on. No better place than a gay bar to dance and have fun. Best!
p.s. let me know how the waxing went