Meditations on a Thursday

- I just ate a fun-size 3 Musketeer. It tasted like nothing. I know it was sweet though, because it made my teeth hurt. I’ve decided that my best bet is to eat grits and Lunchables until my sense of taste is restored, because they taste quasi-normal, and they’re accessible. Sodium? Who worries about such things?

- I find that I have two prevailing moods at the moment – mad and sad. Neither one is preferable to the other, but if I had to choose, at least sad doesn’t make me want to punch people. I’m not a violent person – to the contrary, I’m pretty easy going – but that doesn’t mean that I don’t have the capacity to want to kick someone in the shins.

- I’ve really been missing my parents’ pugs since my visit last weekend. I can’t explain it, except to say that their little velvety snouts burrowing into me was pure comfort, and when a person can’t taste much of anything and feels mostly mad and sad, a little snout digging into your leg is better than the highest dose of whatever the drug companies are peddling as the miracle cure these days.

- I have a little road trip today. A client wants a warm body in their office this afternoon, and I’ve been drafted, which is to say, shanghaied. If it weren’t raining, and it weren’t a 2 hour drive, and it weren’t a boondoggle of the highest order, I might be more amenable. As it is, I’ll just plug into NPR, JACK-FM and maybe my CDs and just pretend I’m going somewhere fun, like, say – the dentist. And since I’ve been feeling mad and sad, I’ll use the drive home to sort through that debris, and see what I can do to dilute the angst. I would use the drive down there for the same goal, but I find that self-analysis often makes my mascara run.

- Zumba tonight – I need to get back in that habit, because it’s hard to be in a bad mood when you’re struggling to grapevine across the studio without getting run over by that skinny young thing to your left. Plus, it’s good for me, it releases alleged endorphins, etc. After Zumba, Project Runway. Which is also good for my mental health, since it’s an appropriate place to express outrage. Over fashion, sure, but outrage is outrage – it’s transferrable.

- Enough with the crazy dreams! What I wouldn’t give for a full night of sleep without trying to catch planes, find elevators, clean up piles of dog poop, prevent office uprisings, take tests in high school, play bartender and have a babies. I wake up exhausted. I seem to remember once getting some sort of holistic walnut essential to put in my water and Lola’s to ease anxiety. But alas, the Phoenix and Dragon is no longer across the street, and I wouldn’t know where in Nashville to buy healing potions, totemistic colorful stones and readings to divine my future. What I probably need to do is buy some new pillows, wash the bedding and devote more time to winding down at night.

So, in closing – make it a great day!

Uh, yeah.