So the house next door to ours is owned by Miss Jean. She is "Mama" to the most delightful 4 year old in the world, whose name is Christian.
He likes me well enough - I'll bring stickers, play with him and whatnot, but Matt, well, it is all about Matt. Those two will sit on Jean's porch and play with cars, roughhouse and generally misbehave for as long as Matt is willing to stay. Christian will tell you that Matt is his best friend, and Matt loves that kid as much as anyone.
Next to Matt, I am chopped liver. Whenever he sees me, the first question is, "Where's Matt?"
Anyway, Matt is working late tonight and when I got home, Jean and Christian were on the porch so I went over and visited. Christian asked me about Lola and said, "Why doesn't your dog like me?" He cocked his head and raised and eyebrow. "Is it because I'm black?" I about fell over. Back in the day, Lola wasn't overly fond of anyone, and since I had a ton of black neighbors, I used to joke about her being a racist dog. As it stands now, her only bias is against kids, and Christian is no exception.
Jean, to her credit, burst out laughing. I turned red and stammered out the excuse that she really just doesn't like small kids, to the point that we kennel her when Henry is in town.
But kids can smell bullshit for miles and I wonder if he really believes me.
I wonder if I believe me.
That said, I got home and laughed my ass off.
And then I took my racist, ageist dog out for a pee. And now I'll feed her.
Kids really do say the darndest things.